this month im being, as usual. still listening to a lot of choral music. still making candles. taking breaks and long walks. making coffee every morning.
finding myself thinking about the fullness of being, about the World. my screens having been scaring me more than usual, especially the one that lives in my pocket. it often feels like there is some invisible barrier that i can’t identify, that if i knew what it was i’d be able to walk past, into some brighter light. listening to the song Shipbuilding by Robert Wyatt and imagining, we are all just thrown into life. but, the screens can be revealing sometimes too. i watched the movie Yi Yi this month. i read emails from friends that made me smile. i let my screensaver go on and on.
home for the holidays, it’s swampy and sandy here. living at sea level, flat and south, i wasn’t able to see the conjunction. my dad and i climbed up to the roof, we watched the sunset and waited for the sky to darken. things look small from up there, the other side of my ceiling.
this is my final newsletter of the year, i’d like to thank everyone who has reached out to me, bought a candle, or engaged with this project. it helps me find meaning, in a project that is about meaning in the first place, about being. i plan to keep growing this thing in the new year, and im excited to share it with you as i go. as usual, i’ve updated my website with this month’s batch of candles, hope you like.
this month, sound artist and co-curator of Biorhythm ϙue, guides us on a deep, graceful sonic journey. whispers float by like smoke. a beautiful, affirming piece. in their own words, “I was researching sound frequencies and pre-natal period of (already) individual's experience of life. This work is inspired by a Tomatis Method. In a nutshell, they record the sound of mother and father voice and process it through filters to mimic how the babies hear outside sounds from the utero (womb) and let the small patient listen to it once they are born. It helps with attention disorders, calms, and carries our psyche to the pre-natal watery and ever-calm state.
This soundpiece is an attempt to give everyone listening to it such a state throughout 2021 and beyond.”
last year, my resolution was to laugh at myself more. not in a cruel way, but to find humor in my eccentricities, in my own seriousness. laughing helps me stay light, it helps me pass some boundary, allows me to continue on. this week i’m overjoyed to include a video by jess potter (1/2 of daily enjoy), a shining light in my life! She’s out here asking the Real questions. thank you jess. Here’s a picture of us in the cemetery this past summer (yes my eyes are closed).
this month, i’m turning wax drippings into a quasi year end list (i know, another list, this is My newsletter sooo, deal with it). here are a handful of things that have affected me this year, in no particular order, and a few im excited to continue exploring in the new year
-films: my letterboxd says i’ve watched 117 them. a few that stayed with me: ordet, the green ray, happy together, beau travail, edward II, the face of another, antonio gaudi, irma vep, fanny and alexander (tv version), celine and julie go boating, full moon in paris, the sacrifice, alice in the cities, l’argent, la notte, portrait of a lady on fire, scenes from a marriage (tv version), the meetings of anna (my last film of ’19, but who cares) (if you are a movie person send me recs!)
-albums, not all of these came out this year: picnic - picnic (this is coming out early 21, but im telling you Now it will be an instant classic, Pendant level drifters from some really special people), vase - variations, pontiac streator - triz, ju ca - uneven specks of dust that which we cannot ever expect to see, shinichi atobe - yes, ulla - inside means inside me, ulla - tumbling towards a wall, agustin carlevaro - recital de tango, maurice ravel - miroirs: v. la vallée des cloches, janet jackson - when i think of you, hildegard von bingen, everything my friends make and send me
-are.na (my preferred mode)
-SS/FW 1999 menswear
-this photo of daniel day-lewis
-cherishing little moments
-The Meal (can’t believe that was this year…)
-my weekly meditation group
-swimming, going to the river, being near water
-listening to my friends talk about things they are interested in
-cocteau twins (forever)
have a happy new year
behind the flame,